LONDON – The 2018 World Chess Championship came to an early, and shocking, conclusion today, when both players were disqualified for testing positive for anabolic steroids, one of three substances banned by […]
In a flagrant escalation of their agenda of utter non-aggression, and a continuation of their publicly stated desire to just get along, the Canadians have today made good on their threats to […]
PARIS – As has been the case every year since the armistice ending World War I was signed at the 11th hour, of the 11th day, of the 11th month, 100 years […]
Just months after repealing a modernized health and physical education curriculum that included such cutting edge concepts as “Don’t Sexually Harass People, Especially If You Like Having A Job And Usable Reputation,” […]
LAKE OF THE ISLES, NY – Signed by over 35 million Canadians, with messages in more than 50 different languages, a 100-metre high sympathy card appeared on the American side of the […]
It appears sense may be returning to the land that invented the Turducken, string cheese, and deep-fried butter. In a tepid rebuke of 2016, when 62,984,828 Americans voted to eat glue because of […]
TORONTO – In a high society event attended by a who’s who of Canadian DIYers, amateur gardeners, and alternative currency collectors, one of this country’s flagship retailers today unveiled an entirely […]
An already embattled Trump administration – desperately trying to find a way to prevent the equivalent of 0.002% of the current population of the United States from crossing the border and destroying […]
In a contest held by the horror specialists at Human Rights Watch, the U.S. Capitol Building was named the hands-down winner for most frightening House in America. It is the second time […]
“Wow. Did you see that guy?” one parent asked another, as they and their children moved as a raucous pack along a heavily decorated residential street in Toronto, midway through filling their […]
