In a stunning blow to Democrats, and the prospects for progress of our generation in general, legal experts in the United States have expressed doubts that the 62 million people who chose to vote for Donald Trump can be impeached, along with the president.
“You can question their sanity. You can question their intelligence. You can question their motives for voting for a presidential Ponzi scheme, in which the currency is hate,” said Roland Underhill, head of the Long Arm Of The Law Manicure Service, a legal think tank based just around the corner from the Capitol Building.
“But, unfortunately, you can’t impeach voters. Yet.”
The question has arisen in the wake of President Donald Trump coming under fire for acting like Reviled And Multiple Times Bankrupted Businessman Donald Trump, a development as underwhelming and grimly predictable as this entire gas station fire of a presidency.
“Sure, you could say that the people who hired a bull with anger management issues to run the world’s largest china shop should miss a turn on the next round of personnel decisions, but that isn’t how our system works,” Mr. Underhill continues, before releasing a 14-minute sigh so loud a fleet of Viking ships have to be waved away.
“So, while we can all take a certain amount of satisfaction in seeing the flat tire that is Donald Trump finally getting changed, what we really have to ask ourselves,” and here the sharpest legal mind in Washington pauses and pours himself another scotch, “Is who the hell is driving this thing?”