Saying that if the human race didn’t have anywhere else to go that wasn’t its problem, planet Earth today served notice that everyone, everywhere, had to be off its outer crust by […]
In a midday press conference to update an anxious world on the spread of the coronavirus, the WHO added a new statistic to the usual numbers: the number of people who might […]
TORONTO – Local police are on the hunt for a man they believe may have shook as many as two dozen hands yesterday, in a brazen virus-transmitting spree with no clear motive. […]
Experts in not-needlessly-dying say as many as 8,000 lives have been saved today by an unlikely source: the novel coronavirus. This, after America’s largest gun convention was cancelled over fears that people […]
The ground pangolin stopped in the long, swaying grass of the African veld, and turned to face a visiting reporter who had just asked him if he was aware that a virus […]
“Let me put it this way. I wouldn’t spend much time worrying about current events. Any possible issue you are worried about right now, is just a few days away from being […]
“No no no no no no no,” a coffee cup in Markham, Ontario said in growing desperation early this morning, as the man who had just purchased him and his contents of […]
A man strolls across a busy street in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. A large truck bears down on him, but the man doesn’t notice, engrossed as he is in his phone, and reading […]
Even as the world grapples to contain the coronavirus, a new, far greater threat to the established order has emerged. One which could cause the greatest upheaval in human history: Communicable inequality. […]
Despite having just convinced more than 30,000 relative strangers to vote for him in the last election, through a combination of fear-mongering, bribery, and empty promises to return them to a time […]
