Despite having just convinced more than 30,000 relative strangers to vote for him in the last election, through a combination of fear-mongering, bribery, and empty promises to return them to a time […]
***The following article contains graphic descriptions of government officials purchasing food. Reader discretion is advised.*** In what many are already calling the darkest moment in Canadian history, late last night Prime Minister […]
A group known as The Really True Patriots Who Are Way More Patrioter Than You’ll Ever Be Look It Says So Right On My Shirt, have been forced to cancel their plans […]
Displaced by massive forest fires that have burned barren swathes across their tinder-dry nation, a vessel carrying more than 200 Australian climate refugees has reportedly entered Sri Lankan waters, hoping to […]
High level peace talks between the wealthy representatives of two countries’ military-industrial complexes broke down today, after it became evident that there would be no immediate way to monetize the process for […]
Normally you would find a satirical article here. In this case, it would attempt to skewer the fetishization of war so banally common in the world today – and which this week […]
“Or even just emptive action, that would be fine too,” says Ty Misrun-Inought, just one of the 8 out of every 10 Americans who agree that human activity is fuelling climate change. […]
As the news that Megan Markle and Prince Harry intend to voluntarily give up some people’s dreams (being royals) to live everyone’s dream (being Canadian) began to spread, a particularly noxious noise […]
Brace yourselves Canada. Tim Hortons – famous for selling litres of hot asswater, boxes of stale sugar pucks, and soups that are old enough to vote (all brought to you by an […]
“Sure I could just send an email, or descend from heaven in a blaze of light, smiting people left and right until I get some Me-damned attention around here,” says Jehovah The […]
