In an odd, sad, and strange ceremony held to mark 30 years since David Hasselhoff sang the Berlin Wall down, US President Donald Trump today unveiled his warning to those who would […]
In a move that industry insiders are calling “gross” and “pretty fucked up,” Google’s parent company Alphabet today quietly acquired the rights to name every single child born on this planet for […]
Wasting no time following the death of former leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the Islamic State today confirmed that they would be going with the horrifyingly obvious choice for a new commander. One […]
In a stunning development for a province that many Canadians had dismissed as being 90% badlands, and 10% poor urban planning, Alberta today pulled an ace out of its yellow vest when […]
Immediately following a meeting with climate activist Greta Thunberg on the periphery of the Montreal Climate March, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau made a bold, unexpected, but notably on-brand announcement. “In honour […]
In a stunning blow to Democrats, and the prospects for progress of our generation in general, legal experts in the United States have expressed doubts that the 62 million people who chose […]
Scientists taking core samples at a remote location in Antartica have made a shocking – but probably not significant – discovery: Dinosaurs. Obese ones. Trapped in SUVs with just one dino driver […]
In an extraordinary move following centuries of fighting like people and people, cats and dogs today announced that they have ratified an agreement to battle the global scourge of climate change in […]
A small town in Indiana has been spared an utterly avoidable disaster this week, after local police intercepted a potential school shooter. The SWAT-assisted takedown occurred after a neighbour tipped the authorities […]
LONDON – In perhaps the most moving speech ever given in a chamber that has faced some of the most fearsome and ferocious challenges a nation has ever stared down, Boris Johnson […]
